Mummy's entry - on giving birth

It’s interesting that Rye Li has yet to ask me about the birds and the bees, not that I want her to also. :D

She knows that a baby comes from the mummy’s tummy and that the tummy will grow bigger and bigger and when it is big enough, the baby will come out. She also knows that the baby will either come out from the tummy or from the vagina but she has never thought about it until recently when I told her one of my good friends has just given birth to a baby girl. And she went:-

Rye Li: Baby T came out from Aunty J’s stomach ah?

Mummy: Yes, Baby T came out from the stomach coz her head was facing up inside the tummy and cannot come out from the pot-pot (our home slang for referring to the vagina)

Rye Li: Oh

Mummy: Rye Li and mei-mei came out from mummy’s pot-pot

Rye Li: Eeeeeyuucks! Disgusting!

Mummy: Well, there’s only 2 ways of the baby coming out. It’s either from the tummy where the doctor will cut the tummy and once the baby is out, the doctor will sew the tummy up. Or the baby will come out from the pot-pot.

Immediately she replied “Next time when I have babies, I want my babies to come out from my pot-pot!”

And I thought she would tell me that she’s never having babies. :D

Mummy's entry - On her conversations

Rye Li being the natural chatterbox that she is never fails to surprise us with what she has to say. At times, she can be really rude as she must always have the last say, of course, with me telling her off for being rude. But still, stubborn as always, she will then give me that “hmmph” look when she knows she can’t answer me as if her actions seem to be louder than her words.

Here are some more of her conversations with us…

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One night many months back, while on the bed getting to sleep, her papa got close to her to give her a goodnight kiss but instead smell her and she went :-

Rye Li: Why you smell me? You think I’m McDonalds? You want to eat me ah?

Or while lying down on the floor watching tv and we accidentally brushed against her, she will go :-

Rye Li: You think I’m a chair? You want to sit on me?

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She loves to complaint about her little mei-mei whenever Haye Li does something wrong. I know she wants to see my reaction towards her mei-mei and I do scold or correct Haye Li when she is in the wrong too. They’re both at the stage where they will fight over a toy or something and at times mine or their papa’s attention. When one does something, the other will follow. It can be so tiring! For events that I didn’t witness and this girl will come to me and complaint about her mei-mei, depending on my mood, I will tell Haye Li off or at times I will tell Rye Li to stay away from her mei-mei especially if she knows her mei-mei is going to snatch her things.

Last nite, Rye Li came to complain to me that Haye Li stepped on her when she was lying down on the mattress. I didn’t see this and I know Haye Li didn’t purposely want to step on Rye Li and she probably want to get to the other side in which Rye Li was in the way. I just took a different approach this time….

Rye Li: Mummy, just now mei-mei step (ped) on me when I was sleeping on the mattress

Mummy: What do you think I should to her? If mummy scold her, she will probably cry and then she will do it again. So how?

Rye Li: Beat her

Mummy: Yea, but she will just cry and then stop. And probably do it again to you. So how? What should we do to mei-mei so she can learn to behave?

Rye Li: Beat harder!

*Maybe a sign I should stop smacking them when they’re naughty*

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On Mother's Day over the weekend, we spent the day at my parent's place and Rye Li was hanging out with her two cousins, Ro Wyn and Jo Tien. My mom (their Grandma) was with them at that time and in their conversation, my niece, Ro Wyn mentioned that "Grandma is fat".

Rye Li replied "You're not fat Grandma, you're just nice. My papa is fat!"

This really made her Grandma's day that day!

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The most interesting of all are her conversations with her papa over the phone when he is away on his business trips. There will always be the duty calls at nights before her bedtime.

A typical conversation will sound like this :-

Rye Li: Papa, where are you now?

Papa: I’m in XXX

Rye Li: You sit aero plane ah?

Papa: Yes

Rye Li: You stay where papa?

Papa: I’m staying at XXX hotel

Rye Li: Oh, you stay with who?

Papa: I’m staying alone

Rye Li: Ok, what are you doing now?

Papa: I’m with my customer having dinner

Rye Li: Your customer what name?

Papa: XXX

Rye Li: Your customer boy or girl?

Papa: Boy

Rye Li: You having your dinner where?

Papa: In a restaurant

Rye Li: What is the restaurant (‘s) name?

Papa: xxx

Rye Li: Papa, what are you eating?

Papa: I’m eating so & so. Ok Rye Li, papa got to go already.

Rye Li: Ok papa. I love you papa. Talk to you tomorrow night. Good night papa (*typical response every time she ends the conversation*)

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At times, the conversations can also be like this…

Rye Li: Papa, you go there for how many nights?

Papa: 2 nights

Rye Li: So you come back Friday ah?

Papa: Yes, I come back Friday night.

Rye Li: Oh, who is that papa? *upon hearing some voices at the background*

Papa: Papa’s friend and customer

Rye Li: What’s your friend (’s) and customer (‘s) name?

Papa: xxx and xxxx

Rye Li: Boy or girl?

Papa: Boy and girl…Uncle XXX and Aunty XXX

Rye Li: They stay with you in your hotel room ah?

Papa: No, they don’t stay at the hotel

Rye Li: Oh. They stay where then?

Papa: I don’t know Rye Li

* Note: I have not taught her at all to ask these questions to her papa and I myself don’t even ask such things of him. God knows where she has learnt how to interrogate her papa like. She would always ask if her papa is with somebody or not and whether that person is staying with him. I wonder if we women are all born natural at asking these questions. LOL!

Mummy's entry - "I hate you!"

There’s always first for everything and I have wondered before whether my kids will ever say those three words to me. I have seen on TV and in real life where kids do say these to their parents and I do find them offending. I cannot recall if I have ever said this to my parents before which I guess means that I didn’t as well as I would remember things like this (of course, if I did say these three words to them before I hit my teens, I seriously would not remember).

Rye Li just said “I hate you!” to me just now. When she said it, I was taken aback and immediately I asked her to repeat what she has just said and I could see in her eyes that she knew she was in the wrong and she kept quiet. I forced her to repeat and eventually she said “I forget (forgot) already”

I’m guessing she learnt this from TV as we never say such things to each other at home. So what actually caused her to say such things?

Well, lately, she has been very rebellious. For some time now, she loves answering me back and at times, she will also be physical with me but she will only lightly beat me or throw soft punches at me or show monkey faces at me especially by showing her tongue at me. She never uses her force on me as she is aware of the consequences after that. Although she is also aware of the consequences that she will face for answering me back or showing her faces at me, this girl loves testing my patience (in hubby’s words, she just loves bullying me). I guess she’s smart in that my punishment for her would be me yelling and threatening her. I have started beating her too sometime last year, usually, hard slaps on her thighs or arms or hands. I could see the shock in her eyes when the first time I really gave her that hard whack, nothing to be proud of but I wanted her to know that I mean business when I’m scolding her.

Before that time, I was never a believer in beating my kids although I was brought up with a cane. It was only when words were not working to discipline her that I bought a cane so that I can use it to threaten her. And then I realized by threatening her with it will not work eventually and I used it twice on her before but they were not hard caning. I don’t have the heart to use it on her really. And she is really scared of the cane. So now, I have been using the cane as a threat a lot, so much so that even Haye Li is terrified of it as she has seen numerous times of Rye Li getting really scared. I don’t even have to use it on them to show them that it hurts as I usually will hit the wall or door very hard just to have that loud whipping sound to scare them off.

Anyhow, back to the story. There were many events leading to the girl not being happy and also me having to scold and nag her. So she was already super duper cranky and black faced when she found out I’m only giving her 4oz of milk to drink before her bedtime [I’ve reduced her milk and water intake at nights due to her still peeing on her bed, being diaper-less]. So when the bottle of milk was given to her, she said “I don’t want to drink milk, only 4oz!” and I was in no mood negotiating with her and replied “It’s okay, don’t drink it then!”. She’s also aware that I was in a foul mood and that was when she went “I hate you!”

Now I’m thinking, whether this toddler of 4 years and 4 months actually is aware of these three words or not. She sure knows how to use it to its proper context for a first timer though. I chose to believe that she doesn’t know exactly what it means and that she’s only influenced heavily by TV (and perhaps I need to relook into what kind of shows she watches).

And also, perhaps, I should look into anger management for myself? I do not like the shouting and nagging part of me, so much so that I’ve become and now termed as a MOMSTER. And I notice the MOMSTER appears when I’m extra tired, stressed and especially when hubby is away on business travels.

I’m sorry Rye Li for always nagging and shouting at you. Mummy doesn’t know how to reverse the impression you have on me that you’ve become smarter in knowing how to irritate mummy more. How-la girl? You also have to help mummy to be a better mummy by not provoking me. Gosh, I’m speaking to you as if you’re a teenager already….LOL. Ok, I hope when you ever get to read this, you are a teenager and that you need to know you also need to do your part and teach me how to be a better mummy ok?! ;) But remember this girl and I know you do, that no matter how angry or mad I am at you, I will always love you!

More on my conversations

Some conversations I had with mummy (and also my mei-mei)......

a) Scene 1 ....when I was drinking milk during bedtime

Rye Li: Nah mummy, I (have) finished my milk. *passed half finished bottle to mummy*

Mummy: No, there's still milk in the bottle

Rye Li: That's not milk, it's all bones from the milk

Mummy: Very funny, finish your milk now!

Rye Li: *Giggling*

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b) Scene 2 ...when I was really grumpy having to wake up so early on a Monday morning for school

Rye Li: Why papa can sleep and I have to wake up

Mummy: Papa can work from home so he doesn't need to wake up early like you. Your school starts early

Rye Li: Why mei-mei also can sleep, (and) I cannot sleep?

Mummy: She will wake up soon when we leave for Aunty Ng's

Rye Li: Mummy, when you (were) 4 years old that time, you also have to wake up early for school ah?

Mummy: Yes

Rye Li: You cry also?

Mummy: Yes, like you la so grumpy in the mornings and grandma has to scold me.

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c) Scene 3...when mummy was angry at me and I noticed she was smiling at mei-mei and not at me

Rye Li: Why you love mei-mei (and) you don't love me?

Mummy: Did I say that?

Rye Li: *Nodded her head*

Mummy: When? When did I say that?

Rye Li: Why you smile(d) at her (and) you don't (didn't) smile at me?

Mummy: How to smile at you when I'm angry at you? I'm angry at you because you were naughty, you didn't listen to mummy. Rye Li, I will always love you whether you're naughty or not. When mummy doesn't smile or talk to you does not mean mummy do not love you. Mummy will always love you. You understand?

Rye Li: *Nodded her head*

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d) Scene 4...when mei-mei was showing her temper at me

Rye Li: You see, you didn't sleep properly, now you grumpy-grumpy

Haye Li: *whining and kicking*

Rye Li: Cher-cher ask you to sleep, you don't want to listen, now you grumpy-grumpy

Haye Li: *still whining and kicking*

Conversation of the day!

Rye Li: You beat me, I beat you back

Mummy: You cannot beat people!

Rye Li: Why you can beat me?

Mummy: I am your mummy; I can beat you when you’re naughty. I beat you because you’re naughty. Next time when you are much older and when you become a mummy, you can beat your children when they are naughty.

Rye Li: I want to have so many children!

Mummy: *Laughing* Yea, we shall see about that!

Rye Li: I don’t want a husband; I only want to be a mummy.

Mummy: Cannot! You must have a husband to be a mummy. You cannot be a mummy alone by yourself.

Rye Li: No way! Choi!

[I sound so much like mummy these days!]

Mummy's entry - Little Ms. Bossy!

My Rye Li is also a little Ms. Bossy. I am aware of this with her behaviour in our household and also when she is with her cousins.

The last 1 month, I have been taking her and 3 of her friends (one boy and 2 girls) from the day-care to school every weekday morning. And boy, having four 4 year olds in the car is no easy task. During the first week of school, I saw Rye Li’s true colour and this is probably how she behaves at the day-care all this while too. She is not happy that her friends got to sit in her car. Since her place in our car has always been at the front, next to me, she kept asking me “why my friends no need car seats?” and “I want to sit behind too”, etc. Of course, I didn’t bother giving in to her and her face, was black throughout the short journey to school.

All of them knows Mammamia soundtrack and hence, the 4 kids would be singing throughout the journey as well. The first day, Rye Li joined in. After that, till now, she refused to let me play the soundtrack and I know it’s because her friends know how to sing the songs. Rye Li likes to show off that she knows a lot of things so in this case, she cannot. I didn’t give in to her that first week and let her friends enjoy the soundtrack for the first 3 weeks till I myself got fed up and now they are listening to my radio. :D

There is one girl who is also very strong in character (I believe stronger than Rye Li’s) while the other girl and boy are softer in nature and will usually give in to Rye Li and this other girl. Everyday, for sure Rye Li and this girl will get into an argument and I had to threaten these 2 to stop fighting or else I will leave them 2 by the roadside to apologize to each other. They have been quoting this ever since when I warned them each time to stop fighting. LOL!

When I asked Rye Li why must she always fight with her, she will say “XX always like to do (bully) me, so I fight with her la”. I’m also guessing Aunty Ng (their caretaker at the day-care) has a role here as she always threaten each of them when they do not want to finish their medicine or food at the day-care, that she will give it to either one of them. By the way, this is also the girl Rye Li slapped before when Rye Li was only 2 and a half years old!.

There was one time in the car, Rye Li was sulking big time for something she didn’t get her way with and I told her off. XX (who also speaks quite well, the best of them all), upon hearing me telling Rye Li off said “Rye Li, you cannot have it your way the whole day, you must take turns” and Rye Li immediately rebutted “XX! This is my car okay and I can have it the whole day!”

These 2 strong-headed girls also fight with each other to get the attention of the other 2 kids. One will show off with one thing and the other will rebut with another thing. When I chose to ignore, the arguments can get quite bad and I just have to shut them off by telling them not to fight and warning them. Sigh!

I didn’t want to make it seem to Rye Li that I’m siding with her friends all the time so when her friends do some wrongs in my car, I will tell them off nicely. XX will get the most, as she loves pushing the other kids one side, to get out of the car first or bully the other kids when they don’t listen to her. The very first time I told her off for this, she was surprised and showed her black face and I made her wait while the others get off first. The next day and after that, she will let them out first and told me “Aunty, I let ZZ out first” as if getting my approval means something to her (all kids are the same, they all want the needed attention and recognition). And just to add, whenever I scold XX off, Rye Li will add “XX (is) always so naughty!” and the other girl, the soft-natured one will add on “Ya, XX (is) always so naughty!” The only boy is always to himself or singing if Mammamia soundtrack is on. I’m guessing he is so used to the girls fighting. LOL!

There are times Rye Li will tell me “I don’t want my friends to sit in my car” or “I don’t want XX to sit in my car”. I have to explained to her why I am sending them as well since I need to drop off her mei-mei to the daycare, her friends are just following us to school as their parents cannot send them. Anyway, this is just until end of February as March onwards, her school will start at 8am and the other kids’ parents will be able to drop them off to school then.

This week again, Rye Li got jealous when I was talking to her friends and told me “I don’t want you to talk to my friends” or when I happened to answer one of them “yes, my dear” when they were calling me to tell me something, Rye Li went “Why you said ‘my dear’?, ZZ is not your daughter okay!”

I bet you that once I have stopped sending her friends to school, this girl will miss her friends in our car.

Mummy’s entry – Little Ms. Smarty pants

Some of Rye Li’s countless comebacks…

When I could not answer her endless questions….”you are 33 years old, you must know!”

When we asked her to do something for us….”why you cannot do yourself? You cannot walk ah?”

When we talk to her at bed time…”can you be quiet, I am trying to sleep”

When we threatened her that she will lie in bed alone at night in her room since we need to do our work outside as she refused to fall asleep …”you go do your work-la” [this used to work when we want her to lie still in her bed].

Actually, reverse psychology doesn’t work on her most of the times. She is a bossy kid and hence, she gets into arguments with some of the kids at the daycare. I found out at one stage last year, she didn’t want to join the kids in the garden during playtime and stayed indoors. And when I asked her why, she said “because my friends don’t want to friend me” and I took the opportunity to tell her that she cannot be bossy all the time and that she needs to learn how to play with the other kids without having to win all the time too in games, if not, no one would want to be friends with her and she would be all alone.. And she responded “I don’t want to play with my friends, I want to be all by myself!”

She is very observant and has started to compare things a long time back. She loves asking us “why mei-mei can…..and I cannot?” and there was one time, her paternal grandmother was in town and when we got back home at night, we made Rye Li shower before we got her ready for bed and she went “why poh-poh didn’t shower and I must shower?”.

The most difficult part is when she noticed naughty kids got away with their wrongdoings and she started questioning on this. It is tough to come up with good reasoning when your kids ask so many questions. Now I know why my parents at times asked me to shut up and not question them when I was young. I have been told off too for being such a busybody. And as much as I’m trying not to do the same to Rye Li, I just find myself doing so especially when I do not have reasonable answers for her endless questions.

Of course I need to add that Rye Li listens to reasoning (we just need to drill it into her). She would rebel initially and only after much explanation, she will accept our answers eventually.

It's tough being a mummy! LOL

Being rude

Recently, I have been told off quite often by mummy and papa for being very rude especially when we’re out of the house.

Just last weekend when we were having lunch at a restaurant, I saw this really fat person walking past the restaurant and I went “Haha, that uncle so fat!” and I laughed away. Immediately, papa and mummy said that was rude and I should not say such things.

And yesterday morning when we were in the lift of our place to go to Aunty Ng’s, there was this uncle in the lift when we entered and I went “Eeeya, this uncle (looks) so scary!”. Immediately, I was told off again by papa and mummy.

Mummy said I need to build up my social etiquette if I want to go out often.

Why’s & other observations

Rye Li: Mummy, your husband is papa. Why you marry papa and not somebody else ah?

Mummy: If I marry somebody else, you and mei-mei not here already!

Rye Li: Oh, alright. Alright!

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Rye Li: Mummy, why you wear glasses ah?

Mummy: Because if I don’t wear them, I cannot see.

Rye Li: Oh, alright. Alright!

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I saw mummy putting on her make up the other day before leaving the house for work.

Rye Li: When I big that time, can I put that thing on my eye?

Mummy: Can!

Rye Li: Can I put lipstick also?

Mummy: Can!

Rye Li: Can I drink ice water also?

Mummy: Can!

Rye Li: Can I drink…er…what is that drink ah mummy?

Mummy: Baileys!

[I happened to chance across one night when mummy was drinking this with ice and after smelling it – a habit of mine smelling things – I really love the smell but was not allowed to drink it as it is an adult’s drink]

Rye Li: Yes, can I drink Baileys also? I like that drink.

Mummy: Can!

Rye Li: Yeah!

Because my voice is so tired!

Continuing from my “Because it’s itchy” response…

I always have excuses, one after the other, when Mummy or Papa ask me a lot of questions or when they tell me to do something. I’m smart in thinking of all sorts of replies and the latest one :-

Mummy and Papa always tell me to greet people when we meet them and almost all of the time, I will just keep quiet and stare and them. I don’t get away with this though as I am always told off after that.

Several days ago, when mummy asked me why I didn’t greet her friends at their house, I went “Because my voice is so tired!”

:D

You got buy me something?

Over the phone conversation on one of papa’s business trips…

Rye Li: Papa, you got buy me something?

Papa: No, papa got no time

Rye Li: Then you go tomorrow morning la

Papa: Around here got no shopping centre

Rye Li: Then you go to Toys’ R Us la

Papa: I don’t know where Toys’ R Us is at

Rye Li: You turn right, turn left, turn right and turn left la (This is what I always tell people if you say you don’t know where so and so is or if you’re lost)

Mummy interrupted: Girl, if papa keeps buying you things how can we go for holidays? Papa need to save money for our holidays

Rye Li: Papa, you don’t buy something for me. You save money then we can go for holiday.

Papa: Ok!

Mummy’s note: To all traveling working parents out there, don’t keep buying things for your kids as they will expect it all the time. KLIA is making big bucks of her papa as you will notice a toy shop on the way out.

Because it's itchy!

During one of the nights last week when I was in my usual black mood, I scratched mummy on her face. She immediately yelled at me and went "WHY DID YOU SCRATCH ME????"

I immediately responded "Because it's itchy!"

Mummy wasn't too pleased with my answer and nagged me. She also scratched me back after that to prove her point whether it was itchy or not. Guess I need to be more careful next time when I feel like scratching her.

Me first, me first!

It’s been some time ever since I had this “me first” syndrome. Everything we do, I always have to be the first one and I will go “Me first, me first!”.

When we reach or leave home, I have to be the first one that enters or exits the house. If I don’t, I will give you my infamous black face and will sulk. My Kakak will give in to me but not my mummy at times, especially when she’s rushing. Mind you, my mummy will just let me cry it out if I burst into tears which is why I will just sulk instead (saves the energy).

When it’s time for my shower, I will get upset when my mei-mei has her bath first and I will complaint and sulk big time after that (to mostly getting either nagged or ignored by my mummy).

This has been annoying mummy a lot lately as she always nag me that there are no such thing as “Me first” but I will still insist as my friends at the daycare always do this to me.

So mummy has been telling me if I like this “me first” business a lot, the next time when we’re at the doctor's, I can go first instead of my mei-mei and I will quickly respond “No, mei-mei first!” and this has always been the case every time we see the doctor together. I hope we’re not seeing the doctor soon.

Mummy's entry - how Rye Li got her handsome prince

How hubby got to be Rye Li’s handsome prince?

It all begun when hubby started reading books to Rye Li a long time back. All those princesses’ stories that contain the word “handsome prince”, he would paused after saying “handsome prince” and go “like papa”. And then he would also add “Papa handsome or not?” to only get a response from Rye Li “yes!”. Thus, the poor girl has been brainwashed her only handsome prince is her papa!

How has this affected her? Well, whenever you ask her who is her handsome prince, she will go “My papa!”

Recently, when we were at our holiday at Perhentian island (will update on this when I have the time), we kept bumping into the same couple at the resort. And so happened one night, they were sitting next to our table at the restaurant. So the guy started a conversation with the girl….

Guy: What’s your name?
Rye Li: Pretty, pretty princess
Guy: *Laughing* If you’re pretty princess, then I’m Handsome Prince
Rye Li: No, my papa is my handsome prince!
Guy: If that is the case, then I’m Prince Charming
Rye Li: *Laughing*


The other day, we had a conversation about husbands and it lead to….

Mummy: Papa is my husband
Rye Li: No, papa is MY husband!
Mummy: How can papa be your husband? He’s your papa.
Rye Li: What about me? Who is going to be my husband?
Mummy: One day, you will meet your boyfriend and then you will marry him and only then he will be your husband.
Rye Li: I don’t want to marry my boyfriend, I want to marry a handsome prince like papa. I want to marry papa.
Mummy: You cannot marry your papa-la, papa is your papa.
Rye Li: *Still being stubborn* I want to marry papa, my handsome prince. I don’t want to marry my boyfriend.

*I need to record this conversation!*

So, men out there….if you want to have your little girl/s to have you in their minds forever, you know what to do now!

Mummy’s entry – the things she says!

Don't let her innocent look fool you.... :D

Rye Li’s not even 3 years old yet and she sure has a lot to say! At times I feel as if she’s like an old aunty (yes I know, she probably got the lingo off me!). There have been so many things lately she has conversed with us which (I hope I’ve remembered all) caught us by surprise but last night’s outburst from her to her paternal grandparents really reminded me that I need to update her blog on this.

Being grandparents, they like to tease her now and then which usually will make Rye Li irritated and she would reply back with a “NO!” or “I don’t want!” and even “I don’t friend you”. But last night, she went “Next time don’t come (to) my house!” which made her Ah Kong and Ah Por burst out in laughter. Of course, I had to reprimand her and told her not to be rude and further explained to her later that it was not a nice thing to say. I told her to just tell them not to disturb her if she doesn’t like what they have to say. Not sure if she understood my lecturing or not.

There was even one time when her Ah Por told her not to watch too close to the TV and she replied “I don’t want to talk to you” and continued watching her Barney, ignoring her Ah Por.

Last week, when we picked her up from the daycare, Aunty Ng told us to be careful of what we say in front of the girl. Apparently, she told one of her daycare mates, after seeing her in a Mamy Poko diapers, “So expensive diapers, waste money only!”

I have myself to be blamed for this as several weeks ago, she saw some Mamy Poko diapers for her mei-mei, Haye Li which I got as samples. I guess it reminded Rye Li of her time when she was wearing Mamy Poko diapers at nights. We used to point out the Pooh bear and friends characters from the diapers at nights before bedtime. I’ve stopped buying this brand since their quality isn’t as good anymore and that Huggies is a cheaper alternative for at nights (she only wears diapers when we go out for a long time or when she wants to poo during the daytime so I have resorted in buying cheaper diapers for this).

Anyway, when she saw Haye Li’s Mamy Poko’s diapers, she asked me to buy some for her and I replied (without thinking) “No need, they are so expensive, waste money only!”. I didn’t realize that she would use the same on others. I guess we as parents need to be mindful that not only we need to be careful for not swearing in front of the kids, but also other negative things that we are so used in saying.

Other than the above negative stuff she has to say, she loves conversing with us now. One night while watching her ritual cartoon before bedtime, she turned to me and said “You know what happen (ed) to my leg at Aunty Ng’s today?”. And I replied “what?” and she continued “I scratch (ed) and scratch (ed) until the thing (the mosquito bite on her leg) come (came) out”

Or she would tell me that her friends at Aunty Ng do not want to friend her anymore because they are all so naughty (I think it's definitely the other way round).

At times, I would ask her stuff of what she did at the daycare and she will tell me a lot of things. I wasn’t sure whether some of the things were real or not till I asked Aunty Ng and true enough, all the things she had to tell me were true.

There was one night as well that we had some guests over and they stayed till quite late. This girl came and asked me in front of them “Why the aunty don’t (doesn’t) want to go home?”. Yes, she is also getting bolder and just last weekend when we had our families over for Haye Li’s full moon, just when our guests were leaving, this girl went “Nobody can take my mei-mei home!”

I’m wondering what will the next shocker from her would be now… sigh!

Some updates

Just to update on some of my conversations with Mummy lately…she claims I talk too much and like to ask questions over and over again at the wrong time. But I feel she asks me more questions and also that I have learnt to talk from her!

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I was singing a tune one day and mummy went…
Mummy: What song are you singing?
Rye Li: I don’t know…..I think (it) is my music class song

I like to make up songs with familiar tunes I know, something I picked up from mummy.

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One night, when it was time for bed and after mummy read me my story…

Mummy: Why papa didn’t switch off the lights ah?
Rye Li: You also didn’t switch off the lights!

I can get defensive at times.

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Rye Li: Mummy, my finger pain
Mummy: How come? What did you do?
Rye Li: I didn’t do anything also
Mummy: Then why your finger pain?
Rye Li: I don’t know

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Since papa sleeps on the mattress these days while I sleep with Mummy on their bed, papa’s mattress would be laid up against the wall daytime and will be put down on the floor nighttime. One night….

Rye Li: Mummy, I put papa’s mattress down okay?
Mummy: No girl, wait for papa first. The mattress is heavy, afterwards it will fall on you.
Rye Li: *went ahead anyway to put the mattress down, and mattress hit me a little and I looked at Mummy for a response*
Mummy: *just gave me the stare* (she likes to do this a lot lately which I tend to ignore)
Rye Li: *went to papa who was showering at that time* Papa, I put your mattress down on the floor for you
Papa: Thank you baby!
Rye Li: *went to mummy* My papa didn’t scold me also

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Rye Li: Mummy, after we finish dinner, we go shopping?
Mummy: No girl, we’re going home, mummy cannot walk
Rye Li: Papa can walk, why you cannot walk?
Mummy: *quiet* (probably dumbfounded)
Rye Li: *with sarcasm tone* Papa can walk, Rye Li can walk, Kakak can walk also
Papa: *laughing*
Mummy: I cannot walk because I’m tired!
Rye Li: Oh

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Rye Li: Mummy, I’m hungry. I want to eat Chickadees
Mummy: That is not proper food for breakfast, it’s junk food
Rye Li: I like junk food
Mummy: No, you need to eat proper food for breakfast. How to grow big and strong?
Rye Li: I want to eat bread only. After I (have) finish (ed) my bread, can I eat Chickadees?
Mummy: No, we only eat junk food when we go for holidays!

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When I’m in the mood, I can tell my own stories and it will go something along like this

Rye Li: Once upon a time, there is a …….and then, he …… and then…..and then…….

After several “and thens”, I will go “the end, finish!”

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Other stuff I like to say….

Rye Li: Thank you soooo much!

Rye Li: I need to sleep ady (already), it’s so late at night

Rye Li: Why you always go toilet one? [mummy goes wee-wee all the time now!]

Rye Li: Why you all like to talk, talk, talk one ah?

Rye Li: My papa is a boy. He hold his kuku bird like this (indicating the action while standing) and wee wee

Rye Li: Don’t fight with me okay?!

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Mummy has been getting a lot of stuff ready for my mei-mei's arrival lately and one of them was my old baby bassinet. When she took it out, I kept playing with it...pics below.

see how i've grown, still can sit but my legs and head are longer!

even after the cover was taken out to wash, i still played with it!

this is me on it the first time, on our way home from the hospital. mummy wonders whether my mei-mei will also look like this, probably bigger than i was

a picture of me swimming at my kai yeh's 2 weeks back, most likely will go back ther next weekend if mei-mei is not out yet

Mummy's entry - Rye Li's speech Part 2

I just have to do a Part 2 of Rye Li’s speech as we had a funny moment last night on our back from the day care. I had a buka puasa (malay: breaking fast) dinner with my clients and lucky for me, Aunty Ng was alright in taking care of the girl and the maid till late. I reached there about 10pm and the girl asked:-

Rye Li: Mummy, where you go?
Mummy: You tell me where I went?
Rye Li: Mummy go (went) for dinner [she knows this as I told her the day before and that morning itself]

Just after we left the day care, she went:

Rye Li: Aunty Ng all alone in the house.
Mummy: Yes, Aunty Ng all alone in the house, so brave of Aunty Ng ya?
Rye Li: All my friends go (went) home ady (already) except for me.
Mummy: Yes, all your friends went home already except for you because Mummy had to go for dinner.

The following was the funny moment we had….

A little while later in the car, I told her that her papa was on the way back from the airport then from China. And that he will be flying to India next week for work. She immediately said:

Rye Li: My papa like superman like that ya Mummy?
Mummy: *Laughing* No, Rye Li, papa cannot fly like superman. He sits in the aeroplane and the aeroplane will fly to India.

This morning, I told her that it is her Kai Yeh’s (Cantonese: godfather) birthday today but we cannot call him as he is in Italy for a holiday. And I continued that he flew there and she went:

Rye Li: Kai Yeh like my papa like that like superman.

And she smiled and I corrected her again.

This is usually how our conversation goes. Just when we think she doesn’t understand, she answers us with amazing comebacks. Makes you wonder what kids are made of these days!

Another one of her ‘dirty habits’ is that she likes saying “I don’t friend you” and she has been saying this for the longest time already. So when she gets upsets with me, she will say this to me and crossed her arm with a sulky face like Pocoyo (the cartoon showing on Playhouse Disney. And my reply will be “Don’t friend, don’t friend-la” (I know, not a very nice thing to say as a mom!).

And she will go “I friend, I friend Mummy!” with a smile and come hugging me. So this has also been going on for a while; a mother-daughter’s ‘tug of war’. I recently told my sister about this and my sister warned me that I will be kept away at an old folk’s home when I get old one day! :D

Mummy's entry - on the girl's speech

Rye Li speaks really well for her age and I keep forgetting to pen those funny moments down. She has said many things to amuse us all this while but the following are the only ones I can remember (with my lousy memory now).


On the way sending her to the day care, we stopped at the traffic lights next to some commercial building.

Rye Li: Mummy, why those people walking there?
Mummy: They are walking to their office
Rye Li: I also want to go to office
Mummy: Can, when you go to school first and then when you finish school, you can go to work.
Rye Li: I don’t want to work, I want to go office only

(Laughing at this as I’m not sure whether she realized the difference between work and office)

Mummy: Then you go office for what?! To work isn’t it?!
Rye Li: *quiet*

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The night before, her papa must have told her that he was going to get her a bicycle when she turns 3. First thing she said to me when she woke up the next day:

Rye Li: Mummy, my papa said when I (turn) three years old that time, my papa (will) buy me (a) bicycle. My papa also buy bicycle and take me to the park and cycle. Mummy and Kakak walk-walk at the park.

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She loves saying “My mummy / papa said I can” when we tell her no for certain things. At times she has her point and we will give in.

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She is easy to reason with when she is in a good mood, which amazes us for her level of maturity. She understands our reasoning and will buy it even after she said no initially. Some examples are as follows:

In the past few months, I have been preparing her for Baby H’s arrival and told her how she has to pass on her things she can’t use or wear to her mei-mei (chinese:little sister). Initially, she said “I don’t want”.

Then I told her that her cousins also pass on some clothing to her as they cannot wear them already and she knows this even before I got pregnant. I further explained that when she can’t wears them, I have to pass on to Baby H or I will have to buy new ones for Baby H.

Also, we had a small fish for her lantern last year for the mooncake festival and decided to buy her a bigger one this year. So I told her that the little fish will go to Baby H and she was reluctant initially. I had to explain to her that since she is bigger, I will get her a bigger lantern and the smaller one can go to Baby H next year when she’s out.

So she will say “Mummy buy me new Minnie Mouse lantern, I give my fish lantern to mei-mei”

Lately, when she can’t wear her clothes or shoes anymore and I will keep them away, she will say “I cannot wear ady (already) ,I give my baju (malay: clothes) to mei-mei”

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She loves reasoning with us. When she can't get her way she will say

"See only, I only want to see"

or when she wants to watch tv longer, she will say

"I watch tv first for a while only"

or when it is time to get out from the shower or bath, she will say

"A little while more only"

or when she wants more sweets or chocs, she will say

"One only mummy, one only!" and at times she will test her luck like "five only!"

I miss my papa

I've been telling my papa and mummy that "I miss my papa" whenever he goes for his business travels. I don't like papa going for his work when he doesn't come home at nights. He's my playing buddy at home and I sure miss the fun when he's not around. Mummy is not as fun as papa - at least he really spends the time with me and make me laugh.

Just last week, he was in Penang and when he called back at nights, I will immediately say "I miss you!". When mummy came and picked me up from Aunty Ng's, I asked her "Where is papa?" and she told me that he was in Penang. And I replied "I don't want, I want my papa (to) come home now!". So when papa called that night, I told him "I miss you papa, papa come home now" but it didn't work at all as he didn't come home immediately. I was given the lecture by mummy if papa don't work, how to have money and hence, how to buy me things, etc. But I will still say "I miss my papa" and will be sulking most of the times. When I'm really sad, I will also cry.

Mummy wonders where did I learn this from as she didn't mention this to me before. She is now worried if she ever goes away, I will do this to her too which I did several weeks back when she had to go away for a night for work. I said the same thing "I miss you" and really cried over the phone. Papa had to end the phone conversation and comfort me after that.

I'm also aware that papa gets to stay in nice hotels when he travels for work as mummy commented this last week when he was in Penang. She was telling him that we also want to stay at the hotel. So a few nights ago, when mummy made the comment that papa is going to Singapore these few days for work, I told papa "Mummy and Rye Li also want to stay in hotel" and I added "NICE hotel room". Papa thinks mummy influenced me too much - well, she told him what does he expect from me since I spent more time with her when he is away and the fact that I ask alot of questions these days, mummy have no choice but to answer me. And this is where I learn most things from these days.

I miss my papa - papa, when are you coming home? I want to go to the airport to pick you up but mummy said cannot because you're coming home by taxi. Next time ok?!

Mummy's entry - on the girl

It's been a while that the girl's development has been posted in terms of her character and speech. I'm assuming it is also part of the Terrible Twos that at times her attitude is way beyond what we can make out of it and when she throws her tantrums, we tend to ignore her. And most times, she surprises us with her maturity of understanding on a lot of things and can even tell us stuff that we don't know or correct us for that matter. We are often reminded by her (action-wise as well as verbally) that she is no longer a baby.

The following are incidents of the past several months. There are probably more but these are what I can remember (serves me right for not penning them down when it happened):-

On correcting our speech

The girl was lying down drinking her milk from her bottle and she started talking. Her papa told her that she is not supposed to talk while eating and she said "I'm not eating-la, I'm drinking milk"

Her papa has been calling her "baby" even before she was born and this term has remained ever since. At times she will question him "why you call me baby? i'm not a baby-la, i'm rye li" or "i'm not a baby, i'm a big girl ady (already)"

The endless questions of "why, where, what,who"

She loves asking questions now which can really be annoying especially when she repeats them. The things she likes asking:

"who buy this for me one?"

"why you buy this for me?"

"why the baby cry?"/"why the boy crying?"

"papa go xxx for what?"/ "why papa always go xxx one?" [when her papa travels for work]

"after this, we go where?" [she loves to go out all the time, when we're at home weekends, she tends to ask us after her bath/nap, where are we going]

And she has a habit of saying "oh" after we have answered her questions like an adult and at times I wonder to what extent that she understood us. But whatever it is, I do feel she does understand us as I reason a lot with her after she has throw her tantrums. I want her to understand why I was angry and that her being naughty doesn't help the situation. Most of the times I have to admit that I need to bribe her, for example, if she wants something, I will tell her that she has to be a good girl and to listen to me before she gets it or when there is a party/event to attend, she needs to be well behaved or she can't go. So this has lead her to saying "I (am) good girl, I listen (ed) to mummy"

The other day in the car on the way home from the daycare, she was really talking a lot and I just let her be while concentrating on driving and my own thoughts. This went for several minutes when she said out loud "mummy, i'm talking to you-la", she repeated this a few times till I realized it and I had to apologize to her.

Being attached

She knows I can't carry her a lot lately as my back is 'pain-pain' [an excuse that I've been using ever since I found out I was pregnant and she buys this which works fine for me] and so, she is becoming quite attached to her papa. She wants him to carry her most of the time and I can see she is really happy when he returns from his travels.

Just last week, for the first time, she actually cried talking to her papa on the phone when he was in Shanghai for the week. She kept saying "I want papa, I want (to) follow papa there". It became so bad that I had to end the call and comfort her for a while after that.

I only wish she is alright sleeping with her papa at nights but she still wants me. The weekend when I was having fever and didn't want to sleep in her room as I couldn't take the air-cond; the first night without me went alright although she made some fuss. The second night, she cried as if she's never ever going to see me again and so both of them ended up sleeping with me in my room without air-cond. And after this, she insisted that I sleep with her till now [I still have no clue how the sleeping arrangements will be when baby 2 comes].

She is also beginning to show more tantrums lately (perhaps due to Baby 2?) and I notice this is worst when her papa is around. The worst was last night when we had to attend my mom's birthday dinner which she was looking forward to. I'm guessing she was overwhelmed with the other guests there (we had 4 tables) that she refused to sit down with us and wanted to go home! This is coming from a girl who loves to go out and has been very well behaved with all our dinner events. We couldn't understand why she was like that; she insisted her papa to carry her out and when he walks back to our room at the restaurant, she starts crying like she is afraid of something. So in the end, we took turns to be with her throughout dinner outside. Luckily, my niece and nephew were there as well to play with her and towards the end, she was alright joining us back in the room. I guess she needed some time to warm up this time but this was definitely the first time we ever experienced such weird behaviour; she practically clung on to her papa!

Getting scared

Her fears have increased lately. All this while she is only scared of dogs and cats, even the cute small ones! She is now scared of thunder and has been using this as an excuse every night that she doesn't want to go to Aunty Ng's (there was a huge storm last week and I think the caretakers there couldn't exactly carry this girl and give her the attention she needs). When there's thunder at home, she wants her papa to carry her.

She is also scared of the vacum cleaner - she used to sleep through the noise when she was a baby. Whenever the vacum cleaner is on, she will stay away from it and stay put on the sofa. When we were in Penang recently at the hotel's pool's toilet, I accidentally stood too close to the hand-dryer and it turned on. That scared the jeepers out of her and ever since then, she refused to go into the toilet. I tried to show her that it is to dry our hands but it made things worst, she started jumping and screaming, wanting out of the toilet as if she saw a ghost!

Lately, she is scared of balloons! She loves them all this while but we had a birthday party to attend last weekend and the kids there burst some balloons. So since last weekend, we now can't blow any balloons for her and when we start to, she will start crying like she saw a ghost too! She even threw away the balloon she had at home. And we were at the mall just now and someone offered her a balloon and she refused saying she is scared!

Singing songs

This girl loves singing now and she tends to sing songs that I've not taught her and I take it that she has learnt it from the daycare. Just last week, she sang a Malay song to my surprise. I knew this song as it was a song we learn from school. It's the "Bangun Pagi" (malay: wake up in the mornings" and I only remember the first 3 lines. So this girl taught me the remaining ones except for the last one (?) as I can't tell what she is saying. Perhaps if you do remember, I would like to know. She taught me the following:-

Bangun pagi, Gosok gigi, Cuci muka, Pakai baju, Minum susu, Makan Roti, ....and then? and is she right?

Being stubborn

She is really stubborn and wants everything her way (also part of her independence). Before we can help her, she needs to do it herself first. This is fine but when we're rushing for time and can't give in to her, she will start with her tantrums. Very rarely, we will give in depending on the situation but most time we just let her cry it out.

How stubborn can she be? I remember some time last year she wanted something her way before bedtime and I didn't give in. Then she acted up and I wanted an apology from her but she refused. And so I threatened her that if she doesn't apologize, I'm not going to make her milk. She just sat there sulking with her thumb in her mouth and at times was staring at me. I ignored her and went to sleep. I knew she was tossing and turning after that and I asked her if she wants milk or not but she ignored me. And eventually she slept without her milk! I really didn't expect that as I thought she would want her milk.

When reverse psychology doesn't work on her

I tend to do this a lot as in play reverse psychology on her. Mostly, it works but recently, it has back-fired on me. This girl knows how to switch off the TV and I'm trying to ger to switch it on too since it's the same button but somehow, she doesn't want to switch it on herself. So I told her that if I were to switch it on for her, she will have to watch my shows first and not her cartoons and she went "Ok, for a while only ya!" and she will stress again "for a while only ya". And when I do watch my shows, she likes saying "Ok, mummy show finish ady (already), time to watch my cartoon now!" although my shows haven't ended.

On being so independent

Only recently, she doesn't want to wear her diaper when we go out. If we're going out for a long time, I will make her to as I don't feel comfortable bringing her to our public toilets just as yet. But this girl still wants her diaper when she poos. At home, she will bring a clean diaper to us and said she wants to poo. I have tried many times to tell her to poo in her potty or toilet bowl but she refuses. I even nag her that she is wasting my diaper and my money only for her to reply "it's my diaper-la, not mummy (s)". Oh, she also must have the last say to most things!

She also wants to wear her clothes or remove them on her own. We are not allowed to help her until she asks for it.

Being hygenic?!

Her papa scolds me at times for this as my little one can be clean-freak most of the times. When her hands are dirty, we need to wash or wipe them immediately. If her clothes get wet, even just a little, she wants a change of clothes and this one is not my doing, it is the daycare's!

But this is where it gets interesting. Only just recently, I notice when she do kiss other people other than me, she will wipe her mouth with her hands. Even when she kisses her papa. So I tested her today on this and true enough with me, she was alright, didn't do anything after she kissed me but immediately wiped her mouth when she kissed her papa. So her papa asked her why she wiped her mouth and she replied "Because got saliva" . Haha...at least I feel I'm still wanted! ;)