Thursday, April 29, 2010

Update: Diaper-less at nights mission ABORTED!!!

Mummy was so gung-ho in training me to go diaper-less at nights over a month go, the thing is, it only last for 2 weeks! She realized that it was going to be super duper tough to break the habit as I pee like 3-4 times in a night and I can even sleep peacefully on my wet soiled pajamas and bed. So I’m back to diapers at nights (hooray!) and she said when I start to have dry diapers (if ever) in the mornings, she would look into this again.

As much as I know I won’t be getting my Barbie dollhouse soon, I’m cool about it as I don’t get disturbed by mummy to wake up and pee. I think mummy is happy too that she doesn’t need to worry about me wetting my bed anymore.

Thursday, April 08, 2010

Mummy's entry - "I hate you!"

There’s always first for everything and I have wondered before whether my kids will ever say those three words to me. I have seen on TV and in real life where kids do say these to their parents and I do find them offending. I cannot recall if I have ever said this to my parents before which I guess means that I didn’t as well as I would remember things like this (of course, if I did say these three words to them before I hit my teens, I seriously would not remember).

Rye Li just said “I hate you!” to me just now. When she said it, I was taken aback and immediately I asked her to repeat what she has just said and I could see in her eyes that she knew she was in the wrong and she kept quiet. I forced her to repeat and eventually she said “I forget (forgot) already

I’m guessing she learnt this from TV as we never say such things to each other at home. So what actually caused her to say such things?

Well, lately, she has been very rebellious. For some time now, she loves answering me back and at times, she will also be physical with me but she will only lightly beat me or throw soft punches at me or show monkey faces at me especially by showing her tongue at me. She never uses her force on me as she is aware of the consequences after that. Although she is also aware of the consequences that she will face for answering me back or showing her faces at me, this girl loves testing my patience (in hubby’s words, she just loves bullying me). I guess she’s smart in that my punishment for her would be me yelling and threatening her. I have started beating her too sometime last year, usually, hard slaps on her thighs or arms or hands. I could see the shock in her eyes when the first time I really gave her that hard whack, nothing to be proud of but I wanted her to know that I mean business when I’m scolding her.

Before that time, I was never a believer in beating my kids although I was brought up with a cane. It was only when words were not working to discipline her that I bought a cane so that I can use it to threaten her. And then I realized by threatening her with it will not work eventually and I used it twice on her before but they were not hard caning. I don’t have the heart to use it on her really. And she is really scared of the cane. So now, I have been using the cane as a threat a lot, so much so that even Haye Li is terrified of it as she has seen numerous times of Rye Li getting really scared. I don’t even have to use it on them to show them that it hurts as I usually will hit the wall or door very hard just to have that loud whipping sound to scare them off.

Anyhow, back to the story. There were many events leading to the girl not being happy and also me having to scold and nag her. So she was already super duper cranky and black faced when she found out I’m only giving her 4oz of milk to drink before her bedtime [I’ve reduced her milk and water intake at nights due to her still peeing on her bed, being diaper-less]. So when the bottle of milk was given to her, she said “I don’t want to drink milk, only 4oz!” and I was in no mood negotiating with her and replied “It’s okay, don’t drink it then!”. She’s also aware that I was in a foul mood and that was when she went “I hate you!

Now I’m thinking, whether this toddler of 4 years and 4 months actually is aware of these three words or not. She sure knows how to use it to its proper context for a first timer though. I chose to believe that she doesn’t know exactly what it means and that she’s only influenced heavily by TV (and perhaps I need to relook into what kind of shows she watches).

And also, perhaps, I should look into anger management for myself? I do not like the shouting and nagging part of me, so much so that I’ve become and now termed as a MOMSTER. And I notice the MOMSTER appears when I’m extra tired, stressed and especially when hubby is away on business travels.

I’m sorry Rye Li for always nagging and shouting at you. Mummy doesn’t know how to reverse the impression you have on me that you’ve become smarter in knowing how to irritate mummy more. How-la girl? You also have to help mummy to be a better mummy by not provoking me. Gosh, I’m speaking to you as if you’re a teenager already….LOL. Ok, I hope when you ever get to read this, you are a teenager and that you need to know you also need to do your part and teach me how to be a better mummy ok?! ;) But remember this girl and I know you do, that no matter how angry or mad I am at you, I will always love you!

Saturday, April 03, 2010

Mummy’s entry – training to be diaper-less at nights

Since weaning Haye Li has been so easy, I thought I might as well trained Rye Li to be diaper-less at nights while I still have a helper. Also, it would save us some money as well.

I have been telling Rye Li for months that she is a big girl already and that she doesn’t need to wear diapers at night especially since she does not wear diapers during daytime for quite some time now. But she refused and I also I was too lazy to force her then.

So lately, I took a different approach and told her that her diapers in a year costs me RM400 and with that money, I can buy her a Barbie Doll’s house (actually, I have no idea how much a Barbie Doll’s house costs and whether there is a such thing too). Her immediate response was “Ok mummy, I don’t want to wear diapers already and I will wee-wee in the potty in my room!” (I told her that a potty will be put in the room for her easy access).

We are into the 7th night already training her and how has it been? It’s been a total failure and my sleep disruption is getting worst with not only Haye Li waking me up through the nights but Rye Li too.

First night – I learnt that this lazy bum will not get up to pee so I had to get up to make her pee. She peed 2 times on the bed and 1 time managed to pee in the potty. Of course, we had to change her pajamas too and her bed sheet in the morning.

Second night – I made sure that I will wake up through the nights to make her pee but I failed the first wake up call and she is to blame as who would have thought she would pee after like 1 hour plus into her sleep from her last pee. But the remaining two times were successful. Her pajamas and bed sheet were again changed.

Third night – Only successful night! And I made sure I praised her like mad and I was pretty sure that this is IT to having her fully trained. I woke up 3 times to make her pee; 1st one at 11 plus pm (yes, I sleep that early now coz I’m so sleep deprived), 2nd one at 2 plus am and 3rd one at 5 plus am. She wakes up at 7am and I also made sure she pees first before taking her milk.

Fourth night – She peed once and that was because I couldn’t wake up on time to make her pee. This was earlier in the night and I also put layers of nappy cloth under her so her bed sheet was totally dried up in the morning.

Fifth night – She peed twice and this time she got serious scolding from me as after the first round of peeing and me having to change her and all; the next round when I woke her up, she refused to pee and went back to sleep. And true enough, shortly after that, she peed again. The bed sheet was changed again.

Sixth night – She peed three times! Partly my fault too as I was too tired to get up on time but I was surprised as to how much pee she has in the potty with her 3 attempts at it too.

I am now thinking of not letting her drink any water at nights anymore and only her milk which is like 7oz at her bedtime. And also probably I will need to set the alarm to have me wake up on time to make her pee.

Tonight is the 7th night and I’m so dead tired and as much as part of me wants to go back to letting her wear her diapers, another part of me is also determined to continue this training. I have been psyching her to get up own self but no such luck yet. There has got to be a better way. I’m so envious of my close friend’s daughter who is 2 weeks apart from Rye Li and has not been wearing diapers since she was 1 year plus (she was having dry diapers in the mornings then which led her mom to just let her go diaperless). Rye Li has never ever gotten a dry diaper at all in the mornings and I’m also wondering whether it’s in the genes since I used to wet my bed until I was like 7-8 years old.

Should I just let her wear diapers till she wears it out herself and stop torturing myself further?!!!!