being abandoned

Mummy says she’s gonna train me to say “Papa, why are you abandoning us again?” when I start to talk. You see, even way before I was born, Mummy complaints that he always abandon her when he goes for his business trips. Initially, Mummy wasn’t used to it all and didn’t like being at home alone so she always laments and use this phrase when Papa has to go. And when Papa calls home when he’s outstation, first thing Mummy would say is “when are you coming back?”.

Back then, Papa used to go away for up to 3 nights and eventually Mummy couldn’t take it any longer (after the 2nd night, she misses him terribly) and told him 2 nights are the max he can go for unless it’s an overseas trip then she cannot have her say anymore (it will be Papa’s boss’ say!)

Now that I’m in the picture, Mummy has restricted Papa to go for only a night coz she feels more vulnerable. I would say she’s just paranoid! She tells Papa a lot of “what ifs” situations like “What if someone were to break into the house while he’s away?”, “What if there was an emergency like me being sick or the car broke down?”

So poor Papa has to comply with Mummy’s wishes and has dutifully gone for a night to his Penang trips so far. Wonder how Mummy will cope when Papa has to travel overseas for his sales meetings or for other business. It hasn’t happen yet.

Anyway, Papa is abandoning us again tomorrow and even though it is a day trip, it still doesn’t count coz it’s a Saturday! He’s going down to Singapore with Peh Deh (Papa’s brother) for a dive exhibition.

Mummy thought she can have her day out too since Ah Por and Ah Kong will be down and they can babysit me. But she just got to know that they won’t be. Lucky for her, she got plan B – I will now be heading to Ai Yee’s (mummy's sister) and will have Kakak (Ai Yee's maid) looking after me with Grandma too. At least I got more people to carry me around!

Hey I just realized…. Mummy, why are you abandoning me too?!!!

Penang, here I come!

I’m going to Penang next week! Yippie!!! Have been hearing of this place for so long but never got to go there. Papa asked Mummy whether we should drive up there so that they can test me for the journey to Perhentian Island in June (It takes 4 hours car ride to get to Penang and about 7 hours to the jetty to Perhentian Island) . Mummy was reluctant initially coz she doesn’t want her pumping sessions (expressed breastmilk) to be affected. She feels that the traveling will affect it and hence, she wont be able to express as much as before especially when I go to Aunty Ng’s.

But since Papa’s birthday is coming up (and also the fact that Mummy has been dying to go there for a long time now), Mummy gave in. She will be taking leave from work and we will follow Papa up to Penang. Papa goes there nearly every week for work.

Seems that we will be staying in the hotel for the first night there and then we will be staying at Ah Por’s for the second night before we head home. And this week, when Papa comes back from Penang, Ah Por and Ah Kong will follow him back too. They want to do their visa….they will be going to China soon. So nice…maybe one day I’ll get to follow them there too.

Mummy is keeping her fingers crossed that her milk supply for me will not get lesser during this trip. She’s been complaining already that it is getting lesser by the day and she thinks it has got to do with stress. And she’s worried now about the packing she needs to do for this trip – she’s scared that she will forget to bring along some of my things. She should be chilling out more.

My 3rd jab

It's time for a jab again. This 3rd one was delayed by my doc coz he said since I was a small baby, it's better that I get the jab later. Moreover, this one can cause fever which Mummy and Papa are praying that I do not get it. The last 2 scares have been enough for them.

This time round, Papa got to drive us to the hospital. Mummy said he has to go along as well from now on since it's so hard to find a parking space there. At least with Papa around, he can drop us off first as the queue to see my doctor can also be quite long. There were a lot of people there and babies too as usual. So we had to wait for my turn. But I had to be weighed and measured first and Mummy was delighted that my weight now is 5.4kgs (nearly 12 pounds) and my height now is 57cm.

I was very inquisitive with the surroundings, looking here and there. I cannot help it, there were so many movements every where. We were waiting for like half an hour before Papa showed up. He said he gave up looking for a parking space and went and park at the hotel's parking space next door. He said more expensive but at least he doesn't need to wait and look for an available space.

Not long after that, it was my turn to see the doc. I don't know why but I was somewhat attracted to my doc. While he was talking to Mummy and Papa, I kept smiling and talking to him but he didn't respond to me, he just kept talking to Mummy. Then he asked for me to be put down so he can check me. I tried talking to him again but he busily went on checking me out, pressing here and there. He told Mummy that I was growing well. Mummy said that she has not been successful in giving me formula and he replied that I am a smart baby, knowing what is best for me. I'm beginning to like this doc!

He then lifted me up and asked Mummy to carry me, with my back facing him. He asked Mummy to hold me a certain way and the next thing I knew; I felt a sharp pain on my right. I screamed and Mummy managed to calm me down and immediately I stopped since I don't feel the pain anymore. Mummy said I was a very good girl this time at the doc's.

Mummy asked the doc whether she can take me swimming already and he said can as long it’s just playing with water and not leaving me in there for long. She told him that they will be taking me to the island in June and asked if this is okay and the doc said no problem. Papa was really happy to hear this. So Aunty Pei See, I will see you soon in June! Don't forget to get my baby gear ready for me!!! ;)

Ah Mai's visit

I’ve been hearing for weeks now that Ah Mai (Papa’s sister) is coming to visit from LA. And so will Ah Por (Papa’s Mummy), Ah Kong (Papa’s papa) and Peh Deh (Papa’s brother) too. It seems that Ah Mai comes back to Malaysia now and then. The last time was when I was still in Mummy’s tummy, I think when I was 5 months plus growing. So this visit is mainly to see me and also to do her passport.

Weeks before Ah Mai came back, I’ve been told that she got me a lot of clothes and when she arrived here, oh boy, were there heaps of stuff! The clothes she got me are really cool and I got some dresses too. I was laughed at when I wore the dresses type. Mummy kept saying that I look like a boy in a dress – how rude! Papa said he’s not used to seeing me with a skirt. I had enough of hearing how botak (bald) I am now….I cannot help it if my hair keeps dropping off.

Ah Mai, Peh Deh, Ah Por and Ah Kong all went back to Penang after spending several days at our place. After that, Ah Mai came back again to spend the remaining days with us before she leaves for LA again. One of the nights, she had to take care of me by herself as Mummy and Papa got a wedding dinner to attend. Mummy kept reminding me to be good to Ah Mai before she left the house…wonder what she means by that coz as far as I’m concerned, I’m always good.

Later, Ah Mai reported that I was ok overall except towards the end where she thinks I was irate from the stuffiness outside the hall so she brought me in to the room with the air-cond switched on. But I wanted to be held so when Mummy and Papa came back home that night, they found us in the room with me in Ah Mai’s arm sleeping. She said that when she puts me down in the cot, I will wake up demanding to be carried. So it seems that I bullied Ah Mai.

I was taken up to Fraser’s Hill with both Mummy and Papa and Ah Mai for a day trip. I didn’t get to go to Aunty Ng’s that day. But too bad that I was sleeping all the way there; much to Mummy’s delight. I slept for quite a long time that by the time I woke up, I was demanding for my milk, very loudly too at Smokehouse. I disturbed their fun of having tea and scones there. It was a good thing that it was only us then… my screams seem to be extra loud in the serene ambience.

After that, I was brought to the waterfalls by foot, well, in this case, in Papa’s foot. He was carrying me in the carrier. Not even halfway of the journey to the waterfalls, I fell asleep positioned standing up, inside the carrier of course. So I didn’t get to see much but I heard the water stream, waterfalls and the sounds of the jungle. And not forgetting the laughs and voices of Mummy, Papa and Ah Mai. I believed I was being laughed at again.

The journey back home was kinda opposite from the journey there. Going down from Fraser’s, I became restless and demanded to be carried. Mummy eventually gave in and took me out from my car seat and she nursed me to keep me quiet. It worked coz I was very contented after that and was left to sleep again in the car seat.

Ah Mai was always there to pick me up with Papa from Aunty Ng’s for the remaining days she’s around and what fun that was coz I got to be entertained in the car ride home. Usually, it’s just me alone facing a beige ‘wall’ and I get to see some colourful animals being hung above me. Now and then papa talks to me but it gets boring so I fall asleep. But when Ah Mai was around, she talks to me and I talk back. I’m trying to tell her how happy I am that I get to see her instead of the ‘wall’.

Ah Mai has left already…how fast she came and went. I hear that I may go and visit her at her home over there one day and that I will get to see Uncle Jason too. He’s the one that bought me my music-gym toy way before I came out. I hear that not only is he very big, he’s also white! Hmmm, how white can one be?!

Sick again

Mummy and Papa had a scare when I fell sick once again. It was the first week for Mummy back at work. Papa picked me up at the nursery that Monday evening. Once we got home, he realized that I was pretty warm and he took my temperature. It was 38 degrees and he called Mummy who wasn’t back from work yet. He told Mummy that he’s going to take me to the hospital, at this time I was crying from the discomfort I was in. I was feeling hot all over. Mummy managed to convince him to wait for her to get home first.

While waiting for Mummy, Papa got a wet towel to put on my forehead. And he fed me too. He held me all the way till Mummy came home. Once mummy came home, they got ready to take me to go see the doctor. We went to another doc this time coz my doc was not working that night. It took us a fair bit to get to this doc coz Papa wasn’t too sure where the clinic was. I was tightly snuggled up in the sling around Mummy then. Mummy who took pity on me felt that I should not be sitting in the car seat and instead, wrapped me in the sling on her. By the way, this sling was just bought over the weekend so that Mummy can have her 2 hands free to do whatever she wants when she carries me. I’ve been difficult to her lately it seems. What is wrong with me wanting to be held all the time? I thought all babies should need some TLCs as and when he or she pleases, no?!

Ok, back to this new doc. It’s the usual routine being weighed and measured. Much to Mummy’s and Papa’s delight, I have now officially doubled my birth weight. I now weigh 4.6kgs which is equivalent to 10.12 pounds. But of course their main concern was my fever and how is it affecting me. My turn came to see the doc and he checked me physically. He said other than the high fever I had (which hit to 39 degrees by then), I looked physically alright. He said to give me fever medication every 4-6 hours and to go see my doc the next day. Mummy asked whether will the fever go away and he said usually it doesn’t in babies. It will go up and down for a few days. Mummy doesn’t want another horrible time at the hospital for us again.

I think she prayed very hard coz my temperature went back to normal overnight with the fever medication. Mummy diligently got up through the night and made sure I had the medication. She took leave from work to look after me that day and she told Papa that she will take me to see my doc if my fever returns but it didn’t. So the next day, I was back to the nursery and Mummy back to work. That evening, Mummy picked me up from the nursery as Papa had to work late that day. I wasn’t being my usual self and that got Mummy worried. On the way home, I was crying over little matters. I was really tired and was falling asleep but anything that wakes me, I start to cry over again. I was just feeling uncomfortable and was voicing it out.

Once at home, Mummy took my temperature and I had a mild fever of 37.5 degrees. So I got a dose of medication every 4-6 hours again. And also this time round, my eyes were reddish-pinkish and puffy. Mummy said that if it doesn’t go away the next day, she will take me in to see my doc. My fever went away but not my puffy eyes so Mummy took leave again the next day and took me to see my doc. The doc that jabbed me real hard the last time! Again like the other doc, he checked me physically and said that there’s nothing wrong with me physically. He said that the puffy eyes are a reaction from my fever and it will go away. He told Mummy not to give me fever medication unless my temperature is 38 degrees and above. He said that my fever could be from some viral infection but Mummy thinks it could be from the nursery. He also told Mummy to make sure that I get a lot of rest too.

That afternoon, we went to Aiyee’s (Mummy’s sister) house and I was looked after by Kakak (Aiyee’s maid) and Grandma while Mummy got her rest at Grandma’s who lives on the floor below Aiyee’s unit. Poor Mummy, from the worries and lack of sleep, she too fell sick.

Mummy decided for me to be taken care by Kakak the next day too while she goes back to work. She told Aunty Ng that she will send me back to the nursery the following Monday. I had fun at Aiyee’s. I got to be with Ro Wyn cher cher (big sister in chinese) and Jo Tien ko ko (big brother in chinese). Some more Grandma was there too and she carries me all the time. What fun I had but my eyes were still pinkish. Mummy said it looks as if I’ve been punched in the eyes. Mummy came quite late to pick me up that day but it was ok. I had fun with Aiyee and my cousins. Once Aiyee got home from work, I couldn’t stop talking to her and also to Kakak. I’ve been termed a chi cha por (talkative one)…I must take after Mummy since I hear her talk more than Papa.

First Smile

How can I not forget my first actual smile coz mummy, being the sour grapes, went on and on about it. You see, she wasn’t too happy that I gave my first smile to papa. She kept telling people how she always sings to me, talks to me, and of course looks after me more than papa and yet, I seem to response more to papa than her. She doesn’t understand that what I have lacking, I would want it more, just like any other human being. And in this case, I don’t get to be with papa as often as I am with mummy, so it will make more sense that I will react more to papa.

It happened like this… during my 9th week, Mummy was feeding me her expressed milk through the bottle in the living room. Papa just came back from Penang and walked through the front door. Once he entered, he called out “Baby” and I half smiled. Mummy, upon seeing this then asked Papa to say that again. And when he did, I fully smiled. Mummy yelled out “She smiled!”. Papa came to me and talked to me and this time I kept smiling. Mummy, again the sour grapes, just passed me to Papa and said “Nah, you feed her since she’s so happy to see you”.

She left us and Papa just talked to me. I responded with some sounds which made mummy even more upset. Papa was so thrilled that he said he wants to tell the whole world which for him, his world at that time was just to Uncle Adrian. He went on how it made his day to come home to see me smiling like this. He’s been stressed with work lately so to him, coming home to me is like forgetting all his worries. Sigh, poor Papa. Is it that stressful working?!!

Ever since my first smile, I only responded to Papa for the next few days. After that, it was to everyone. But mummy kept on telling people that the reason I responded to Papa was that I’m mostly exposed to women and children whose voices are higher pitch. So when Papa, who got a lower pitch, talks to me, it will definitely arouse a response from me. Sour grapes!