Thursday, October 30, 2008

Mummy’s entry – When Rye Li met Haye Li

I have to say that I once again, underestimate Rye Li. I should give her more benefit of the doubt. Overall, she has taken to her mei-mei way better than what I expected.

Since Haye Li came out early in the morning and I was already all knocked out by the delivery, hubby went and pick Rye Li up from my sister’s place. He brought her home to make my confinement drink and later, brought her out to get a gift for Rye Li and Haye Li. Rye Li’s gift from Haye Li was bought some time back and has been in hubby’s car all this while. I got her a Disney Princess activity book which has some colouring book, stickers and a puzzle (something she loves doing lately). I also added a Mickey Mouse colouring book in it. Her papa also bought her a toy at the store while she chose a gift for her mei-mei.

By the time she came to the hospital, it was early evening. I made sure that Haye Li wasn’t in the room with me then (something I just learnt from my colleague that week itself, that is, do not have the baby in the room with you yet when the elder sibling arrived).

When she came into the room, her eyes were looking all over – I’m guessing either to see where her mei-mei was or where her gift was. Hubby was carrying her and I asked her to come to me. She willingly came to me. She wasn’t her usual self and that was because she just woke up from the car ride.

Hubby went back to the car to take the presents up – they were huge as Rye Li chose a ‘masak-masak’ (malay: cooking) set for herself while she chose a baby Mickey and Minnie musical mobile for Haye Li (hubby said she insisted on this one instead of a nicer and cheaper one so he gave in).

I asked her if she wants to see mei-mei and she said yes. But she was more engrossed with her gifts than mei-mei later on. I guess this kind of worked as she didn’t react to me carrying and nursing Haye Li later on. When it was time to leave, she did show her face as she wanted to be with me and I reminded her that I’ve told her before (which I have prepared her for many weeks now) that my doctor said I need to stay at the hospital for 2 nights and that her papa will be looking after her. I told her that I would see her again the next day. She accepted it and later hubby told me that in the car she told him “I miss my mummy and mei-mei”. She was also alright throughout the night without me. In fact, too good! Those 2 nights without me, she didn’t ask for milk at all from hubby but when I came home, she had been asking for milk in the middle of the night!

The next day, same thing. Not much of an issue and I told her that we will be coming home the next day itself.

While breastfeeding Haye Li, I pulled Rye Li’s leg and told her that once mei-mei was done, it would be her turn. She found this funny and said “no”. I did this to her many times and her reply was always “no”. On the day we checked out, I tested her again and she came to me. She actually put her lips to my nipple and then went “eee-yuh”. I asked her why as she used to drink my nen-nen and her reply was “Because it’s smelly!”. Haha...reverse psychology do work! ;)

Also, on the day they came to take us home, I asked her permission whether her mei-mei and I could go home with her. I allow her to make decisions when it is appropriate and when she makes them, I praise her. When she was playing with her cooking set, she asked whether her mei-mei can play with her. I told her that she is still too small but praised her anyway for wanting to share her new toys with her mei-mei.

So how has it been so far at home?! Well, she has yet to throw any tantrums or voice out her unhappiness with mei-mei being around. But she has been showing her sulky face when she can’t get things her way – not that she has not been this way too before. The first night home, I happened to put Haye Li next to me on my bed. This is where Rye Li sleeps and when I asked her to come lie down on the bed, she refused with a sulky face. Then only I realized it was her spot and I said that I will put mei-mei back into the cot. Only after that, she lay down on her side. I told myself that I need to be extra careful now when dealing with no. 2 in front of no. 1.

But I am amazed that she is alright with me handling Haye Li all the time and when Haye Li cries, she tells me that “mei-mei wants nen-nen”.

She is not happy that I can’t bathe her now or get her ready for bed. So I’m compromising with her that either her papa or Kakak bathe her and I will wear her clothes for her. I try my best to be with her when I’m not attending to Haye Li but I can tell you, it is not easy at all as you’re already so tired from the sleepless nights. I will post more on the aftermath at my blog. This is all about how Rye Li is taking it to her new sister.

I’m just overall proud of her and I know it has only been a week. I have been preparing her big time for this and I also heard that no matter how much you’ve prepared them for a younger sibling to come, there will still be some resistance. This was why I expected the worst but instead, I was surprised myself. If there are any changes, I will also post on this.


may said...

it's not so easy to become a mother of 2. my time will come soon and i dun think i'll be as careful as you. hahaha...

pity you, already so tired but glad that your big girl understand and can see she's very happy to have her mei-mei ;)

take care....

Sasha said...

rye Li will be a good cheh cheh, :)

KittyCat said...

Rye Li's doing really well, eh? And Mummy too esp in handling the 2 girls :-)